You've tried everything you can think of, but she won't listen. She says she'll go, just not this week. She says she'll go if you go first. Or maybe she just gives you that look whenever you bring it up. You know, the back off look. Ahh, marital bliss. Getting someone to do what's good for them isn't always a joy ride, but these tips should help smooth the road a bit.
1. Be Reasonable
When she tells you you're worrying over nothing, give her the facts. In the United States, one out of every 18 women will develop colorectal cancer. It's the third most common cancer in American women (behind lung and breast cancers). About 75% of people who develop colorectal cancer are 50 or older with no other identifiable risk factors. Although colorectal cancer is the second leading cause of cancer deaths each year in the United States (for men and women combined), getting a colonoscopy can reduce the average person's risk of dying from the disease by 90%.
2. Set an Example
If you're due for screening, go first. This may be beneficial in a couple of ways. First, it proves that you consider the screening important. Second, you can fill your wife in on any unknowns that may be preventing her from getting screened. What was it like? Did it hurt? What exactly did they do? How embarrassing was it? Armed with insider information from someone she trusts, she may be better able to make a decision.
3. Make it Easy
If you've been screened for colorectal cancer before, tell her what it was like. If you haven't, research it. There are different screening methods. Find out about whichever one your doctor recommends. Then, either talk to her about it or print the information and let her read it on her own time. If she decides to go, make sure you're available to drive her home after the procedure. Make the rest of the day nice, complete with chill time of her choice. Most screening methods involve pumping air into the colon; later on, it comes out. So, "making it easy" for her may include ensuring there won't be anyone around later on who she wouldn't want to fart in front of.
4. Be Sweet
"I love you. I want you around, so I want you to get this done." Can you think of any health-related thing that you weren't too keen on but did because you knew it was good for you? (Stopped smoking, got your prostate checked, etc.) Bring it up. Make it clear to her that you consider taking care of yourself your obligation to her, because she loves you. And that sense of duty extends to doing things for her that you might not do if you only had yourself to consider. If you have kids or grandkids, use 'em. "Little Johnny would be crushed if his mommy got sick; as Little Susie grows to be a woman, she sure could benefit from her grandmother's wisdom."
5. Be Sour
Research shows that by age 50, one in four people has polyps, which are colorectal cancer precursors. Even though 90% of colorectal cancer is curable if caught early, more lives are lost each year in the U.S. to colorectal cancer than to breast cancer and A.I.D.S. combined. Those are scary statistics. So, if you feel you need to pull out the big guns, here are a couple of suggestions.
"Your refusal to get screened is selfish. I need you. The kids need you. If you're not going to bother to get a colonoscopy, then I might as well not bother getting my prostate checked either, 'cause you know how I hate that." (You shouldn't actually do that, but sometimes it's useful to throw it out there to get your point across.)
"You're right. Why take advantage of modern medicine? Let's just let nature take its course, like in the good old days, when people died of 'natural causes' and the life expectancy was 40."
